


What Goes On Behind the Camera

by DragonSaphiraReads



Series: Fluffuary 2020 [11]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: canonverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:55:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22652851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonSaphiraReads/pseuds/DragonSaphiraReads
Summary: When they aren’t filming, Thomas’s sides get along quite well. But sometimes, the former dark sides wonder if they truly do belong.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Deceit Sanders
Series: Fluffuary 2020 [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1619986
Comments: 2
Kudos: 87





	What Goes On Behind the Camera

**Author's Note:**

> Like listening to podfics? You can listen to this oneshot on my YT channel here https://youtu.be/cLlL5LBzYYk

“And that’s a wrap! Great job everybody!” 

The sides relaxed at Thomas’s announcement, dropping their video personas. They shifted from their various spots on the couch to sit closer to each other, no longer blocked by the fourth wall caused by the camera. 

Roman stood up from his throne of pillows in the corner and fell onto the couch, raising his arm so Patton could cuddle up against him. Logan shifted to the corner of the sectional, bracing himself as Remus vaulted over the back of it and landed directly in his lap. The rest of the sides were thankful that Logan had had the forethought to ask his boyfriend to wear pants to the shoot. 

Deceit went to the bathroom to fix his outfit while Virgil slipped down from the top of the couch and got comfortable on the sectional. Thomas got up and went to the kitchen, grabbing some bowls and microwave bags of popcorn. 

“I think your fans are gonna really enjoy these shorter videos, Thomas! This was so much fun to film!” Patton called out, and the rest of the sides agreed. 

“I think so too. They like seeing you guys in more casual settings, so this will be perfect.”

“It’s unfortunate that we’re unable to show them our true interactions though.” Logan commented, hugging Remus closer as the other shifted in his lap. “Regressing back to former attitudes has been strenuous in the past.”

“In English, teach!” Roman teased, and Logan rolled his eyes. 

“Acting like we did several years ago when we didn’t accept the “dark sides” has caused tension.” Logan clarified, and Patton sat up in Roman’s arms. 

“Do you guys think we still think that?” He worriedly asked Virgil and Remus, who shook their heads. 

“I know you guys were just looking out for Thomas, and besides, I wasn’t exactly nice either.” Virgil told them, and Remus agreed. 

Thomas walked back into the living room with three brimming bowls of popcorn in his arms, smiling at his sides. “Alright, who’s ready to actually watch Frozen now?” 

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to skip out tonight, Thomas.” Deceit spoke up from behind him, startling the host who nearly dropped the popcorn. 

“Huh? But we were finally gonna watch the movie...” Thomas mumbled, and Deceit shrugged with an apologetic smile. 

“I’ve had a migraine for the better part of today, and it hasn’t improved at all so I think it’s best if I get some sleep instead.”

Thomas hummed, pouting in disappointment. “Well that’s too bad. Maybe we should wait until tomorrow night when you’re feeling better?”

Deceit shook his head. “Don’t be ridiculous, you’ve already made popcorn and everyone’s gotten comfortable. I’ll be fine, I just need to lay down.”

“If you’re sure...” Thomas said slowly, and Deceit took a slight bow before sinking out. The host turned back to the couch, handing out the bowls of popcorn to Logan and Patton before taking a seat himself. 

Then he looked around and raised an eyebrow. 

“Where did Virgil go?”

~

“You don’t need to lie to them, you know.”

Deceit didn’t respond, and Virgil wondered for a moment if he really was sleeping after all. He took a step into Deceit’s room, towards the figure that was lying on the bed and facing away from him. 

“You didn’t need to check on me. Like I told Thomas, I’m fine, it’s just a little headache.”

Virgil rolled his eyes, moving to sit on the edge of the bed. “If you’re actually trying to sleep, then why don’t you change into something a little more comfortable?”

Deceit growled quietly, and Virgil knew he’d hit it on the head. Deceit was still wearing his normal outfit, sans his signature hat which was sitting on the nightstand beside the bed. 

“Shouldn’t you be watching Frozen with the others?”

“As if I care about that when my boyfriend is trying to seclude himself from all of us. Dee, c’mon, you know you can tell me if something’s wrong. You weren’t acting like yourself today.”

A small huff came from the lump on the bed, and Deceit shifted to lay on his stomach, stuffing his face in his pillow. Virgil narrowed his eyes in concern, reaching out and resting a gentle hand on Deceit’s shoulder. 

“Seriously Dee, what’s wrong? This really isn’t like you.”

“I’m just tired... It’s nothing you need to worry about.” Deceit mumbled quietly, and Virgil moved to sit closer to his boyfriend on the bed. He propped himself up against the headboard and patted his lap when Deceit lifted his head curiously. 

“Consider me worried. C’mere and cuddle with me?”

Deceit narrowed his eyes for a moment, but he eventually relented and pushed himself up, laying his head on Virgil’s chest and letting the other run his fingers through his hair. 

They sat like that for a while, and it got to the point where Virgil thought that Deceit had actually fallen asleep. Until, that is, he sensed Deceit’s heart rate spike and something wet against his chest. 

“Dee?” Virgil whispered, worried. He heard a small sniff, like Deceit was trying to hide it. 

“I’m... sorry...” came the whisper back. Virgil’s own heart started to race - what was this, and where was it coming from?

“What are you sorry for?” He asked softly, and Deceit pushed himself off of his chest and sat up on his own, his eyes hidden by strands of hair hanging in front of them. 

“I... don’t deserve this...”

“Don’t deserve what?” Now he was really worried. He’d never seen Deceit like this, or at least it had been a very long time. 

Deceit didn’t respond. He kept opening his mouth to try and answer, but there was no sound that came from him. Virgil sat up, moving slowly over to him to not scare him or cause him to clam up more. 

“Do... you want me to try and guess?” Virgil asked. He knew sometimes, it was easier to simply agree with something than it was to spit it out yourself. After a long moment, Deceit nodded.

“Ok... do you mean this, here? Cuddling with me?”

Deceit nodded, but the look on his face made Virgil think there was more to it than just that. 

“What about... spending time with the others?” 

That only got a shrug, and Virgil chewed his lip. “Ok... is it Thomas, then?”

Deceit didn’t move at all, and Virgil had a feeling he was close. He sighed, reaching for his boyfriend’s hand. “Ernest... Thomas likes you. I promise he does.”

He pulled away, wrapping his arms around himself and pulling a knee to his chest. “But... he can’t trust me.”

There it was. 

“What do you mean?”

“How can he, when he never knows if the words coming from my mouth are true or false? Or if I’m hiding some big secret from him? Or... or...”

Deceit took a shuddering breath, sounding like he was near tears. “I know I’m important... I know Thomas needs me to do my job... But how can he be ok with it?”

Virgil’s heart ached at hearing his boyfriend voice his worries. It mirrored his own worries, the ones he had even now, years after Thomas had fully accepted him and the job he did. 

Deceit had taken longer to be accepted - it was only about a year since Thomas had told him that he was welcome. And just as he had, Thomas had started including him in videos that were all about his personal journey. Meaning that Deceit suddenly had to revert back to his villainous persona that he’d been working so hard to lose. 

What was it Logan had said earlier? ‘Regressing back to former attitudes has caused tension’? 

“Ernest, will you look at me?” Virgil asked, reaching slowly to brush his fingertips against his boyfriend’s scaled cheek. Deceit took a while to move, but Virgil was patient and he waited until finally Ernest lifted his head and met his eyes. 

“Thomas _does_ trust you, and that’s because he should.”

Deceit tried to shake his head, but Virgil wouldn’t let him get a word in. “What we do isn’t always nice. Thomas doesn’t find it fun when I do my job, and not when you do yours or when Remus does his. But he trusts you, because he knows that no matter what, all we want is to protect him.”

“Virgil...” Deceit sniffed before he crumbled, falling into Virgil’s waiting arms. 

“And I trust you too, Ernest. And if filming these videos is too much for you, then we should talk to Thomas. I don’t like acting like I used to either... I don’t ever want to go back to that.”

Virgil rubbed Deceit’s back slowly, pushing away the tears that pricked at his eyes. Hearing Deceit fall apart like this broke his heart.

“I can’t lose you again... not like I did...”

“And you won’t. I’m not letting you get away from me again.” Virgil told him, trying to lighten the mood. 

Deceit eventually calmed down, taking deep breaths and letting his heart settle. Virgil kissed his scaled cheek gently, waving his hand to change both of them into comfortable pajamas that weren’t soaked with tears. They laid back down, Deceit curled tightly against the other’s chest. 

“I really do love you, you know. I know I don’t say it that much, but I do.” Virgil mumbled into his boyfriend’s hair, and Deceit shifted against him.

“I love you too. And... I’m ok to continue with the videos. I can make you fall in love with me all over again.”

Virgil laughed, nuzzling him before closing his eyes and slowly drifting to sleep. 

At risk of sounding like Roman, Virgil whispered that he already did that every day.


End file.
